Gratitude Project #7 - Having health Insurance

Now we all know that the health care system in the States is really broken. Our hospital bills lack price transparency. Our drug companies charge ridiculous markups to the patients. Affordable individual insurance is non-existent. Medicare kept cutting reimbursement to our physicians, causing them to drop Medicare patients. I remember reading on the news that something like 60% of bankruptcy is due to medical bills. The premium of the group insurance that I have through my job keeps increasing, while the co-pays and out-of-pocket maximum keeps increasing every year too. But I am still grateful that we are able to have and to afford health insurance. Because the only predictable thing in life is that you can be sure that it is unpredictable. You will never know when you will get sick. I am grateful for all the prenatal care and all the well-child visits for my baby that we were able to have because of our insurance. I still remember how shocked I was when I opened up the bill from the hospital where I delivered my baby - just one week of NICU stay for my baby amounts to $25,000 without insurance! My heart definitely skipped a beat when I saw that!

Original published on Bubblews: http://www.bubblews.com/news/671810-gratitude-project-6-having-health-insurance

Image Credit: morguefile

Gratitdue Project #6 - Having hot water and a shower

I am grateful for having a shower and having hot water. No matter how stressful my day is, how rough of a time I am having, how hard I am trying to stay sane, I can always count on a hot shower to relax all the tensed muscles in my body, my aching back, the knots in my mind and to relieve all the anxieties that I have. Sometimes, if I have a busy day, that's the only ME time that I have and for that, I treasure my bath time even more. I like to let my mind run blank, and let all the external sensors of my body run free (sometimes we are so absorbed in whatever we are doing in our daily life that we ignore how our body is really feeling). I like to feel every stream of hot water that runs down my spine. I like to feel the rebound of every single cell in my body from the stress that I have imposed on myself that day. Five to ten minutes is all it takes to recover the inner peace in me. Plus I got to be all nice-smelling afterwards =). Having hot water is such a luxury in so many parts of the world but yet it's so basic in the States that sometimes we take it for granted. Well, enough self-reflection for today, now I am ready for a hot shower after getting my baby to bed!

Originally published on Bubblews: http://www.bubblews.com/news/667088-gratitdue-project-5-having-hot-water-and-a-shower

(photo credit: image from google image search - labeled for commercial reuse)

Gratitude Project #5 - Opportunity to be the mirror of my child

I am sure all of you parents know that kids are fast learners and the best imitators. They have superior five senses and they really take in everything that you do, down to the smallest details. It's fascinating but it's scary at times. The other day, I caught my toddler putting a rubber band in her mouth, across her lower teeth, each little hand of hers holding one end of the rubber band, moving it left and right, left and right. It wasn't long before I realized she was trying to floss her teeth, just like her daddy did earlier, with the rubber band. Another time, I caught her pouring milk from her Sippy cup onto her hands and rubbing it all over her body. Yup, her mommy was putting lotion on herself just before that. Now God helps me if I accidentally forget to screw the lid of her butt paste all the way in.

My toddler is generally a happy kid, but she is also super-active and impatient, and she just can't seem to grasp the concept of waiting. Combined with her slightly delayed language development, she gets frustrated easily, and sometimes she would even hits me (which will be followed by a time-out) and she throws tantrums when she does not get what she wants. One time I felt so discouraged and frustrated, and I said to my husband "you know, I am just not a good mom after all. I really have no clues when it comes to parenting. How come my kid has such bad temper (and these other kids that I saw have such good manners all the time)?". Then a frightening realization dawned on me. Children are mirrors of their parents. I have been stressed out lately and haven't had the best temper really. I tried my best not to, but I got impatient and yelled at my toddler more than I would like to, especially towards the end of the day when I was exhausted and she was exhausted. So she must be picking this bad temper thing up from me also. Now whenever I get frustrated with her, I would remind myself to calm down, and even though I am boiling inside, sometimes (I still can't manage to not get mad and raise my voice sometimes) I would intentionally lower my voice and just tell her that her behavior is not good and gives her a brief time-out (a minute or two only because she just won't be still). For some reason, she would actually listen instead of throwing more tantrums sometimes (not all the time but that's an improvement), so I guess I am moving in the right direction.

So parents, examine yourself and examine your own action. Being a mom definitely forces me to face my own weakness, and prompts me to really act on it, for my own good and for the good of my toddler. For that, I am grateful. I am grateful for the opportunity to be the mirror of my child and I hope I will put it to good use. Now next time when I cannot control my own temper, I would have to dig up this post and read this aloud to myself LOL.

Originally published on Bubblews:
http://www.bubblews.com/news/798266-gratitude-project-14-opportunity-to-be-the-mirror-of-my-child

Gratitude Project #4 - My Car

Yup, Lamborghini. That's my car, NOT!!!!!!!

I drive a little Corolla. Yes, it's nothing fancy. It doesn't look cool. It's not sexy. There is no fancy stereo inside the car (it only has a CD player). It doesn't have a sun-roof, doesn't have a butt warmer. It got a few dents in the body from irresponsible people who hit my car in my company parking lot few years ago and never left any notes. And now that I have installed a rear-facing car seat, my passenger seat does not have enough legroom so it's basically unusable.

But, here is the thing. I didn't have a car in the first 5 years after I moved to the States. I had to rely on my friends or the school shuttle system. This is my first car that I got myself after taking the bus to work for 6 months and I got it debt-free. To this day, I still remember the smile I had on my face when I drove my Corolla out of this little Toyota dealership in Alexandria VA, bouncing in my driver seat, tasting real freedom for the first time.

I have been driving my Corolla for 6 years now. She has become a very good friend of mine, and we share moments that belong to no one but us. She knows about all those times when I was sad but didn't want anyone to see me cry, when I would just go inside my car and quietly shed some tears there. She has seen the crazy wild side of me and she has seen the way I danced to the Zumba songs on radio when I was stuck in traffic. She caught all those moments when I felt insecure about myself as I looked into the mirror, trying to fix a few stray hair and my melting eyeliner or mascara. She knew how anxious I was during the last two months of my pregnancy when I had to go to the doctor three times a week, with a hospital bag all packed up in the backseat of my car.

I am just so grateful to have my car, a reliable mean of transportation and an old friend who always waits patiently in the parking lot, ready to take us to where life calls us to be.

Originally published on Bubblews:
http://www.bubblews.com/news/658331-gratitude-project-4-my-car

(Image Credit: morguefile)

Gratitude Project #3 - My Washer and Dryer

The wardrobe of my baby with all the newborn to 3 months clothes, taken back in 2011

I meant to write about my family today but my brainwave just got hijacked by the sight of my washer & dryer so yeah, there you go ~

My washer & dryer are about 2 years old I got them brand new and before that I have always used those coin-based laundry machines they have in our rental place. I dislike those wholeheartedly because:

1. I am a bit germophobic. I hate the idea of sharing washers and dryers with other people, and i hate to think of what people have on their clothes and you know, their underwears. It's just gross.
2. I hate carrying heavy loads of laundry up and down the stairs and dropping a sock or two here and there.
3. People don't always empty their clothes from the washer and dryer on time and I am always stuck waiting for people to remove them (that leads to my #4)
4. I hate it when people move my laundry out of the washers/dryers for me. Now i always try to move my laundry within 10 minutes after my load of laundry is done. I really don't understand why people have to move my laundry (I don't even think I would want to touch other people's laundry because of #1). Just have a little patience people.
5. Have you ever met one of those creeps who steal from your laundry or even worse, put their clothes into your laundry?
6. Now that I have a baby at home. Without my washer/dryer, how can I survive those crazy episodes of projectile vomiting & stomach upsets?

Originally published on Bubblews:

http://www.bubblews.com/news/650955-gratitude-project-3-my-washer-and-dryer

Gratitude Project #2 - My Husband (obviously)

My husband. Now he really should be on day 1 of my gratitude project but this is a bit harder to write about than my baby, not because it's hard for me to think of all the good things in my life that I am able to have and enjoy because of him. Rather, it's because there are simply too many things that I can write about. I like to think of us as two lonely souls traversing this universe (yes we were literally more than 8000 miles apart) until one day, fate brought us together. Sounds cliche but that's really how i feel about this. We dated for seven and a half years, got married and now we just celebrated our third wedding anniversary (July 3). We have been together for a long time and while things have not always been easy for us, I am thankful to have him walk with me for the past ten years. I admit that I have taken him for granted at times, I have taken out my stress and my frustrations on him more times than I would like, I have said hurtful things to him for no good reasons, I have not given him enough of my time and attention ever since we had our first child. But he has been extra forgiving and understanding and although I struggle to verbalize how lucky I am to have him, I feel very very grateful in my heart. There is really no other person that I would like to be with, for he is my love, my best friend, my refuge.

Originally published on Bubblews:

http://www.bubblews.com/news/646908-gratitude-project-2-my-husband-obviously

Gratitude Project #1 - My Baby Girl

That's the hands of my baby when she was just a couple months old

Starting my own gratitude project. I need to, because I have so much negativity in my life lately. I will start with something easy =)

I am so grateful for having a beautiful baby girl (20-month toddler actually but she is still a baby to me). Yup, she is super active (a bit over-active) and she started the terrible two stage even before she turned 18 months. Yes, she drives me insane sometimes. She is such a picky eater that just the thought of feeding her gives me headaches. And yes she won't go down for a nap or go to sleep at night without putting up a fight. She is a master at creating chaos in our little apartment. BUT one giggle, one smile, one hug, one kiss from her takes me to the happiest place on earth. It's the most pure form of happiness I have ever experienced in my life. Sometimes when she sleeps, I stare at my little angel's face and fall in even deeper love with her every second that passes by. I hold her little hands in mine, counting out all ten fingers in the dark, feeling her soft baby skin against mine. And I think to myself, like countless times before, how amazing that she is so beautifully and fearfully made. She is so perfect in my eyes, and I pray that she will feel safe, even when she sleeps, even in her dreams, and even in the most trying times in her future. I grew up in the kind of culture where we are not used to saying "I love you" to our loved ones but with her I can say it however many times I want and more. I love her I love her I love her!

Originally published on Bubblews:

http://www.bubblews.com/news/641971-gratitude-project-1-my-baby-girl